Home Book Review SwankiVY critiques the advertising tactics of Gloria Tesch’s Maradonia-Saga

SwankiVY critiques the advertising tactics of Gloria Tesch’s Maradonia-Saga


This is a revised model of a earlier video about Gloria Tesch and her misleading, abusive, and absurd advertising tactics. The video I had up in advance of contained some video clips and photographs belonging to the Tesch crew, and though I applied them for commentary and criticism as authorized underneath the Honest Use clause, Tesch and co. strike it with a copyright infringement declare. This new video is both equally a reaction to that and an endeavor to ahead my first message without employing their content to do it.

Gloria Tesch has employed abusive, misleading, and hilarious tactics to encourage her self-released novels, up to and which include a declare that she is the World’s Youngest Novelist. Now her wild claims include movie generating credits and “movie star” standing outlined in a ebook trailer she posted on the net.

I left a YouTube comment on her video and she censored it due to the fact I pointed out her lies. So I produced this video due to the fact I just felt like having my say and–dare I say it?–offering her some advice about how she really should be handling her advertising ventures if she would not want to embarrass herself.

The one-way links you may well want:

Gloria Tesch’s Maradonia-Saga “Reserve Trailer”:

Gloria Tesch’s Tv Present Intro (with some stolen photographs and tunes by 3 Doorways Down):

Gloria Tesch’s web-site:

Gloria Tesch’s movie web-site:

Gloria Tesch’s advertising author Facebook account

Gloria Tesch’s Twitter (wherever she at the time infamously introduced that she cannot hear any one in excess of the audio of how awesome she is):

Tv Tropes entry for Maradonia Saga:

Amazon.com reviews of her initial ebook:

Amazon.com reviews of her 2nd ebook:

Yahoo! Solutions hyperlink wherever she shamelessly answered her very own problem to encourage herself and declare to be the youngest novelist:

WikiAnswers hyperlink wherever the admins had to close the thread for abuse due to the fact she stored altering the reply for “Who is the world’s youngest novelist?”

And the history wherever you can see how quite a few instances she modified it (and what they had to do to prevent her and what they had to say about it):

An attention-grabbing YouTube video about Honest Use, for the record:


  1. The Maradonian series makes the Inheritance Cycle look like a masterpiece!
    Also, at least Christopher doesn't go around silencing people who speak out against his works.

  2. You know, much as I love takedowns of bad writing like this (I'm basically addicted to them), I think it's pretty clear that the people who do this are delusional. She's clearly a troubled person. I feel bad for her.

    Still won't stop me from watching these things.

  3. How dare you. Maradonia is the epitome of fine literature. Tesch's prose reads like flowing milk from the breast of Aphrodite. Gloria Tesch is a literary genius, don't you know? She will take her place with the greats, like Shakespeare, Justin Bieber, Dickens, and Amy Winehouse. 

  4. A fantastic critique! Would you happen to know what the bookstore from the trailer was? I could not find anything identifying it.

  5. BTW, if you read the positive reviews on Amazon, a lot of them are more of the "This book was sooo bad it was hilarious!" types, not ones that actually praise the book itself.  Either that or they're out right parodies.

  6. I do dramatic readings of bad fanfiction and I frequently get viewer requests to read Tesch's stuff.  I've declined because I suspected that I might get hit with a copyright claim.  How right I apparently was.

    That said, Daisy Ashford's Young Visiters is lovely.

  7. I thought I should let you know that Miss. Tesch used a screenshot of you in her music video, Wild for the Night Goldilocks (2:03 to be precise) if someone hasn't mention this to you already that is.

  8. Gloria needs to write a completely different book and put a lot of effort into the new book she then needs to really edit the new book and completely forget about mardonia. she need to as you said swankivy get a publishing contract and know how truly difficult it is to get books published. then after a few years she needs to look back at maradonia and then she'll understand the problems of it. I wrote l stories when I was younger too I thought they were really amazing I look at them now and I think out loud you wrote this! but im ok with laughing at my old work because I as awriter have gotten better. the virtue that Gloria tesch never got was her parents telling her
    "it needs work" or "editing it would help" or " its not good enough to be published" those mean things are parents and friends used to tell us about are writing should be honored because they cared about are writing by criticizing us and that's a whole of a lot better than being told your the next great writer.

  9. In hindsight, there is some reason. Someone published their erotic Twilight fanfiction & outsold Harry Potter with it. Maybe Gloria Tesch's fanfiction could have sold well too.

  10. I wish I had found this review sooner, I must say this, thank you so much! This entire Gloria Tesch situation really gets on almost every nerve, right down to my fingertips. I am tempted to post a review myself 🙂

  11. Encyclopedia Dramatica is correct, Gloria is the Uwe Boll of young authors.

    They have so much in common:
    Both can't tell a story to save their lives.
    Both cheat their way into fame and fortune, Boll used tax loopholes while Gloria used her parents.
    Both see themselves ad a godsend when they are the exact opposite.
    Both can't take criticism and have picked physical fights with their critics.
    Both have a YouTube account which they use to garner attention.
    I could go on…

  12. Turns out her family is actually quite poor and they had to sell off their Florida home. She really is a shameless self-promoter. On Facebook she has a merry band of male arselicks and sycophants who heap massive praise on every picture she posts. Nothing wrong in that only she's been stealing pictures from various models and uploading them as her own. Girls with totally different body shapes (including a Gizelle Bundchen pic) and passing them off as her own. She better hope her film comes out soon as she already looks way older than 21, she'll never get away with playing a teenager.

  13. The irony is Gloria Tesch is destroying her own career. They even have a horrible kickstarter for a horrible movie. Its sad really. She thinks shes a special snowflake but shes really a raindrop in the ocean. Im glad you put it all out there. Gloria is eating up a slot that a real talented young writer could be filling.

  14. Since I last visited, the Tesches have become ruined. The parents got divorced, the family lost the house and now Gerry and Gloria are living in assisted living because of throwing it all at this insufferable fantasy of hers. It was amusing before, but now I just see Maradonia as something hideous beyond the quality of writing.

  15. Thank you for my chuckle for today. Showing how bad parenting created entitled children who live in delusions of grandeur. Never knew of her till seeing this video. For the heck of it I viewed here website. She has a music video now. Was afraid to click on the play button.

  16. "I liked the Maradonia books better the first time, wheeeen it was called Harry Potter. – David Spade" – Michael Scott

  17. I once wrote a spoof opening once. (can't call it a prologue or chapter 1 because i decided against writing it, and have thus trashed it) I wrote it seriously, like I was actually making it into a book, but with paper cut-out characters and ridiculous scenarios……… basically if I was jumping on the bad tween fantasy/romance bandwagon.

    The catch was it was a book within a book. My actual main character was going to be introduced by her throwing the 'book' across the room and calling it a stupid love story (or something like that).

    Before I wrote the catch, I gave the spoof to my mom (an avid reader) and asked her to tell me what she thought. I didn't tell her anything about what I was going to do, I was going to let her think that this was a real story I was writing. She told me it was good…….. My AVID READER mother, who reads 3 times as fast as me, told me my stupid story was good.

    I let my sister (also an avid reader) read it later on and she gave me the most withering 'you have got to be kidding me' look ever. So it was bad, my mother is just biased. (just very, very, very biased)

    My point being, parents can be very biased and it's always better to get other opinions.

  18. Well, I got some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that her movie is out (which is fueling her crazy fantasy even more). The good news is that this movie is easily on the level of Birdemic and The Amazing Bulk. It's easily one of the most unintentionally hilarious thing to come out this year that I've seen.

    On one hand, I kinda want her to stop presenting herself like a freak show and have a more healthy state of mind, but on the other hand, I kinda want her to keep making movies if they're going to be as insane and hilarious as this one.

  19. Y'know, more than anything, I think that the whole Maradonia crazy train is actually pretty sad. Maybe if Ms Tesch hadn't been showered with money and praise from mommy and daddy, she would have gone on to produce publishable books. Maybe she would have written a few bestsellers, and she would have fondly looked back on Maradonia as a reminder of how far she's come since her beginner days. But since her parents basically convinced her that she's better than J.K Rowling, C.S Lewis, and a bunch of other great fantasy writers combined, they robbed her of any real motivation to improve as a writer. All I can say is that I feel bad for her, in spite of everything…

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